Yes, I have gotten into some trouble in my day… But here is a brief run-down on the tale of the worst…
Once upon a time, there was a little hole in the wall restaurant, & I got a job there. A few years passed, & I got promoted from waiting tables to doing dishes (?) I mean serving drinks…& for a time it was good. But then the owners wanted to move, & they were gonna sell the little restaurant! This got all of the babies that worked there rather panicked, and one suggestion was that I buy the place…which I kind of thought was a joke, but I did it anyhow (with a little help from my friends).
& for a time, things were good – or so we thought. But in reality, the bookkeeper was pinching off the top, and then Beau died, and then we got robbed, twice – shucks.
So after all of that went down, we owed a bunch of money to the IRS, who are a lousy heartless pack of thugs (there’s a few good blokes in the mix, but it’s a ratio of about, 1:15). The “Service” as it were, did not, and still does not care that any delinquent payments were not received by them – because the bookkeeper kept them for herself. They just decided that I, & my partners were thieves. & that is how it still stands today.
So two or three years ago, I got a call from an “officer” in this “Service” (of Internal Revenue, in case I lost you on that one…) and he asked me if I was in charge during the time period in question (2nd & 3rd quarter of 2007) & I said yes. He asked me if I had made the decision to not pay the taxes, and I confirmed that I had chosen to continue to buy food to cook, in the little fairy-tale restaurant, and to do my damnedest to cover payroll for all the babies that worked so hard there, and that there was simply nothing left after that.
I was thereby held liable to personally a pay a percentage of the debt accrued, by the business, via the Trust Fund Recovery Act. That worked out to a couple-few over 12 large, and after having my tax refunds siezed ever since I have gotten it doewn to about 9 grand.
That is the worst trouble I have ever been in, & it doesn’t look like it is going anywhere anytime soon.
(I am currently enrolling in a payment plan to make a monthly minimum of $135 a month, which means I should be free & clear by my early 40s!)
Tra la la fuck you ♫